This post was updated Oct. 15 at 10:27 p.m.

Chappell Roan’s critics want her to be casual now.

The summer’s “Femininomenon” Kayleigh Rose Amstutz – better known by her stage name Chappell Roan – has spent the past couple of months igniting discourse about society’s expectations of celebrities. She has posted rants on social media about feeling overwhelmed with celebrity status after her meteoric rise in popularity, decrying fans who expect photos or physical touch in public. That same overwhelming feeling led her to cancel her appearances at September music festival All Things Go just one night before the scheduled show. On the red carpet before winning Best New Artist at the MTV Video Music Awards 2024, she told a cameraman to “shut the f*** up” after he said the same to her.

Since then, Amstutz’s public image has become the subject of countless think pieces, commentary and controversy across the pop music world. She can barely post without stubborn back and forths filling her comment sections, and celebrities from other industries have felt the need to defend her statements. Even television dinosaur Saturday Night Live parodied the situation, hosting superstar baby pygmy hippo Moo Deng (played by Bowen Yang) who complained about her own meteoric rise to fame before mocking, then half-heartedly defending, Amstutz’s statements.

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Pop fans have found it easy to label the “Good Luck, Babe!” singer’s social media complaints and public outbursts as somehow unbecoming of her status – how many other artists in the top echelon of the Billboard charts are describing their fans as “random bitches” and canceling shows the night before? Evidently, not many. But Amstutz is right, and the discourse around her recent actions has only proved her point. She has embraced her platform to highlight the insincere, toxic nature of celebrity-fan relationships as she experiences the dynamic firsthand – and fans’ response further reveals that bitter dynamic.

Many of Amstutz’s observations are obvious to all but the most chronically online. Amstutz, who stated she was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and recently with severe depression, should not have to choose between a healthy life and a successful career. The pop star bemoaned fans who harass her in public – including one who left her crying in an airport bathroom after she refused to sign merchandise – correctly identifying that celebrities are entitled to personal boundaries and privacy. Even actions fans may consider especially egregious – such as canceling shows – are not betrayals, but instead are difficult choices Amstutz is making to protect her health and well-being.

In response to these actions, some have alleged that she is exaggerating her concerns, or otherwise blowing known elements of celebrity culture out of proportion. These accusations are patently untrue. For example, Amstutz’s concerns about stalking and harassment are undeniably well founded, even without her own testimonies on social media. Other stars such as Taylor Swift and Miranda Cosgrove have experienced tangible, terrifying attempts on their lives from invasive fans. Even more tragic are the murders of John Lennon and Dimebag Darrell, which were perpetrated by disgruntled fans. Celebrity is a liability, and Amstutz is identifying real anxieties and fears, not inventing issues.

Amstutz becoming one of the few celebrities to publicly criticize her fan relationships does not prove she is somehow more sensitive or less capable than her peers. Instead, her outspokenness demonstrates how much pressure is placed on celebrities – particularly women – to silently comply with abusive social standards. No average person is expected to comply with strangers’ demands at the airport, coffee shop and sidewalk, and neither should she simply do so because she has 45 million monthly listeners on Spotify.

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As she makes these statements, fans complain that she might not be prepared to be a pop star based on her recent actions, rather than consider whether the expectations placed on celebrities are reasonable in the first place. Instead of perpetuating these toxic standards, fans ought to approach her with sympathy. Amstutz is choosing to lose money, forgoing ticket sales and her reputation as she cancels shows. She is actively casting off parts of her fanbase, posting without concern for the media’s expectantly harsh treatment. She is threatening to quit the industry she has found wild success in, giving up her life’s passion in pursuit of a healthy, sound life.

These are not the choices of a manipulative grifter, but of a person in meaningful distress. Amstutz does not need more pressure to comply with arbitrary, toxic standards, nor does she need insistent, vocal support from fans. She just needs to be left alone – which is what she has been asking for since she first aired her grievances.

Whether she wants the world, this city or just a normal life, Amstutz should be given the space she needs to keep on dancing.