In my never-ending quest to set the UCLA population straight
about personal and sexual matters, I realize that I’ve been
ignoring a very important factor in the fornication equation: the
penis.

I’ve been approached by several readers lately who
approached me and offered their column ideas ““ some better
than others. One particularly imaginative young man told me
“Hey Carrie, you should write about licking balls!

The other day, as I was taking my morning stroll from Kerckhoff
to the English Reading Room, I couldn’t help but notice all
of the tantalizing little nooks, stairwells and shady corners that
could serve as perfect locations for a make-out session or a
between-class quickie.

As a graduate of an all-girl Catholic school, I first set foot
on the UCLA campus feeling much like the proverbial kid in a candy
store.

When I’m not assiduously conducting field research for my
brilliant and seminal Daily Bruin sex column I also work on campus
in an office that I will not identify here for fear of raised
eyebrows from my co-workers.