Normally, you want to have some idea of what you are going to do after finishing college.

For a second there, I thought I knew.

But now, when people ask me my plans after I graduate, I give them a long-winded answer that can simply be summed up as: I’m still trying to figure it out.

This spring, I will be graduating with a degree in English, and my initial post-graduation plan was to attend graduate school in the upcoming fall.

I applied to four master’s programs – two in education and two in creative writing. The process was lengthy, and I put a lot of time into those applications. I was hopeful that at least one school would give me the opportunity to enroll next year.

By the end of March, I was rejected from all four schools.

It wasn’t just time that was put into these applications, but effort, money and above all, hope.

Getting rejected was a blow to my self-esteem as both a student and writer.

The plans I had and the purpose I was projecting upon my future suddenly disappeared. I was left with an unresolved feeling of whether or not I gave these applications my all.

Although the experience of not getting admitted into any master’s programs stung, I tried to hold my head up high. Realistically, however, I knew the rejection wasn’t going to end there.

It didn’t.

Without a guaranteed academic structure for the next year, I turned to job applications.

Many students and adults can relate to time spent on LinkedIn, Indeed, Handshake, cover letters, internship research, resume edits, email inquiries, more cover letter writing and the silence that seems to always follow.

I knew finding a job wasn’t going to be easy. I didn’t know, however, that trying to find a job would feel like sending myself into an online black hole of career opportunities that never come to fruition.

The odds felt stacked against me, but I tried to remind myself that I wasn’t the only one feeling this unease toward the unknown.

College is filled with rejection. Life is filled with rejection. Whether it’s regarding one’s education, career or personal endeavors, it’s something we all feel at one point or another.

This experience is universal. So rather than looking at rejection as dismal and disheartening, look at it as proof that our brains are feeling exactly what they need to be feeling in that moment.

Don’t feel sorry for yourself because someone says no, and don’t be ashamed to admit that they rejected you.

Most importantly, don’t feel like you can’t be bummed because simply put: Life can sometimes be a bummer.

Rejection wants us to sit with our uncomfortable feelings. Instead, we should walk around proudly with those feelings.

Rather than looking at rejection as an attack on your worth, look at it as useful information. It’s important how we define experiences like rejection because they are dimensional and temporary, not fixed.

Rejection can be beneficial even if it doesn’t feel like it at the moment. If we look at it with a more constructive approach, we can let ourselves feel humbled by the experience, allowing our paths to be redirected.

An answer of no does not need to take away your hope. It just needs to encourage you to pivot.

Ask yourself questions, explore different options and have conversations with yourself about what you need in life. The important lesson in rejection is learning to move on and grow from it.

It’s easy to think that we are defined by our accomplishments, but I think we as people are defined by much more than that. How we get to the point of being able to achieve accomplishments is what defines us, and that path is never straight or narrow.

The importance does not lie in the achievement, but rather the arrival and remembering what it took to get there in the first place.

Let’s reframe how we let rejection affect our spirit. Instead of giving it the opportunity to instill unnecessary insecurity in us, let rejection be a coat of armor – a means to preserve the path that is meant for us, even if it is unknown.

Sometimes other people are given the power to make decisions that affect us and just because they can, it doesn’t mean we have to limit ourselves to those decisions.

Whether it means trying again, moving on or doing something entirely different, let yourself wander for a moment, because it turns out rejection can also be your opportunity.

Rejection does not determine your life, it is how you move forward from it that does.

If you’re currently facing a roadblock of rejection, that’s OK. It’s just a reminder that you’re still headed in a direction that does not need to be standardized with a right or wrong way.

Wherever this direction goes – up or down, left or right – it’s just a part of the journey.