Crude humor in “˜Jackass’ falls short of hysterical

Jerry Springer’s done it. Howard Stern has kind of done
it. And now, the people of MTV’s “Jackass” are
doing it.

Okay, I will admit, I have been prone to laugh sometimes at the
oddities that transpire on “Jackass.” Okay, I’ll
admit it, I laughed a lot. But my question is, will people really
want to pay to watch the movie that hits theaters this coming
Friday?

The show is in syndication, and they show it all the time on
MTV. Will I be drawn in by the allure of “uncut,” which
I’m sure will promise lots of violence, lots of profanity,
and some nudity? Will I really want to watch more of the same thing
that can already be found on TV?

I just can’t bring myself to say that I will.

When a show already borders on themes of censorship, it seems
like a film version can be made just by slapping an
“uncut” on it, and marketing it in the theaters and on
video. I mean, take a look: “South Park: Bigger, Badder, and
Uncut,” “American Pie: Uncensored,” and the motto
for “Jackass: The Movie” ““ “with stuff
you’d never see on TV.”

And since there’s going to be copious amounts of sex,
violence and profanity, it seems like that’s what will sell.
We might as well make an “uncut and uncensored” version
for every show out there.

I can’t wait for “The Golden Girls: Older, Older,
and Uncut.” This is where you see the real Dorothy and Rose
““ how they are really whores pimped out by a senior citizen
at the local nursing home. There will be gratuitous profanity and
violence, as well as brief topless shots of the prostitutes getting
ready for work.

Or maybe we should have “Family Feud: Behind the
Scenes.” It would show the tumultuous downfall of Louie
Anderson as host, and how Richard Karn fought his way up from the
ashes of “Home Improvement” to become the successor and
host. It would probably show some sort of love triangle where both
Richard Karn and Louie Anderson had sex with the same woman, and
how they both vied for her love, only to have Anderson lose
shamefully and fall back into the ranks of Hollywood Squaredom.
Look, I don’t know if you get my point, but there has to be
more to entertainment than brainless humor based on pain, profanity
and crude situations.

I really don’t know what this says about our society in
general. I know, I know, I’m no role model, and certainly not
a pillar of society or someone even remotely close to an authority
on good morals and such things, but something is happening here.
Yea, yea, yea, this is coming from the same guy that used to go
egging and toilet-papering houses, setting bags of dog poop on
fire, throwing pumpkins at houses on Halloween and all that, but
hey, take my word for it, this is different.

We’re talking about people making millions of dollars by
selling sick humor. And the worst part about it is that it’s
real ““ “Jackass” isn’t contrived. And I
won’t be a part of it.

I used to think that films and music document the current state
of society. You know, life imitates art, art imitates life, all
that jazz; but is this saying anything about us, or perhaps, our
generation? Are people now too apathetic to care about what others
are being influenced by? Are we going to just stand by and watch
our generation and future generations go down the drain? Are we
going to ““ oh I don’t care anymore, do what you
want.