If it’s private, mum’s still the word

On a campus where political protests, mass condom distribution and on-campus gay unions are considered commonplace, the number of taboo subjects among students is steadily shrinking.

But as UCLA students easily navigate some of the nation’s most divisive hot-button issues in their conversations, the topics of grades, financial aid or socioeconomic background compel nervous avoidance from some of the most outspoken students in the country.

“We’re open and we’re accepting. Before, other types of situations would have been looked down upon, like divorcing, but I feel like now society is much more liberal, especially at UCLA and in California in general,” said Sushil Jain, a fourth-year psychobiology student.

Despite what many feel is a highly liberal and accepting climate at UCLA, open conversations about academic achievement can be incredibly difficult.

“Grades are a touchy subject here. UCLA is so competitive, so elite. You have people here from all over the world that were at the top of their classes. If you’re getting bad grades here, people don’t want to talk about it,” said Arvind Devgan, a fourth-year psychology student.

Devgan pointed to a strict “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy among many students when it comes to their grade point averages.

Jain noted that the discretion most students use when talking about their grades is far more distinct with more competitive science students.

“It changes from major to major. If you’re pre-med, you’re probably more competitive, and if you already feel bad, you don’t want to feel any worse about how you’re doing in college,” Jain said.

Most students speak in generalities with their friends about how well they did in classes and especially about how they are paying for college, Jain added.

Speaking in detail about money is generally a taboo subject anywhere, especially, in the case of most UCLA students, how they are paying for college.

“I have heard that marriage counselors say they have a harder time getting married people talking about money than about their sex lives. Money is a sensitive issue,” said Ivan Light, a professor of sociology.

Light said the reason money is such a sensitive subject is because it grazes on the issues of social inequality.

“There’s inequality in this country on the basis of social power. There are poor people, middle-class people and rich people. Money reflects your social class background,” Light said.

Bernard Weiner, a professor of psychology, said evolutionary factors might also explain why certain subjects are considered taboo in society while others are not.

“People don’t generally talk about things that are harmful to a society or the maintenance of a social system,” Weiner said.

Whether or not the discussion of money is directly harmful to the social structure at UCLA is arguable, but, regardless of the cause, discussing personal finances undeniably elicits nervous responses.

“People don’t know how to ask about it,” said Flavia de la Fuente, a second-year political science student. “I feel weird telling people that my parents fully finance my education. I feel bad ““ what if someone there can’t pay for it at all? I don’t want to be resented. I am aware of my privilege.”

Jain rarely speaks in detail about how he is financing his college education, even among his friends.

Whether or not a student is paying for college with loans, grants or his own money, students tend to speak with great reserve whenever the conversation drifts toward tuition.

“Most people are getting some loans, but it’s not common for people to get their whole education paid for, so they don’t want to come out and say that and put themselves into the minority,” Jain said.

Jain added that he believes many students attempt to appear more financially stable than they actually are by maintaining a lifestyle or purchasing items that might indicate financial affluence.

Along with finances comes the uncomfortable subject of social class and ethnicity, which Ann Lee, a first-year business student, said could be a difficult subject to broach.

“We don’t talk about affirmative action. That’s a really touchy subject since some people assume it’s only based on race or ethnicity,” Lee said.

UCLA is not immune to the racial tension that has always characterized Los Angeles, and for some UCLA’s diversity is new experience.

“California is a very segregated place,” de la Fuente said. “A lot of different people come to UCLA, so, for a lot of us, this is the first time that we’ve ever interacted with someone from a very different ethnic background or class.”