Bruin season down the toilet

You have to hand it to the Bruins.It took the past few UCLA
teams weeks to accomplish what this year’s team managed to do
in 1 minute and 45 seconds.

In less time than a typical bathroom break, the Bruins pissed
away their entire season on Saturday afternoon. UCLA, comfortably
ahead with seven minutes to play, coughed up a double-digit lead
against Arizona State and effectively ushered in the start of
basketball season one month early with its infuriating 48-42
defeat.

Now, even if the Bruins show some uncharacteristic resolve the
next few weeks, only upsetting crosstown rival USC will prevent
this from going down as the program’s fourth consecutive
ignominious season.

“It’s going to feed the negative things a lot of
people want to say about this team,” linebacker Justin London
said.

That’s because there are no moral victories when
three-quarters of your fan base is on suicide watch Saturday night
and your season is sinking faster than Ashlee Simpson’s
career. (Did anyone see footage of that lip-synch gaffe on SNL?
Incredible.)

What’s unsettling about UCLA’s latest loss
isn’t even the final score. It’s more the manner that
the Bruins gave the game away.

Up 42-31 midway through the fourth quarter, the Bruins suddenly
began playing as if they saw the ghosts of seasons past.

First, freshman corner Trey Brown bit on the hitch in receiver
Derek Hagan’s hitch-and-go pattern, giving the Sun Devils a
46-yard touchdown and new life. Then after a lifeless three-and-out
from the suddenly punchless UCLA offense, Arizona State quarterback
Andrew Walter struck again, finding the speedy Terry Richardson for
the game-winning score.

“Lack of mental focus came back to bite us today,”
tight end Marcedes Lewis said. “Certain situations where we
needed to make plays, we didn’t.”

Especially with the outcome of the game on the line.

Two blown coverages and Saturday’s game ““ and maybe
the season ““ was history.

So long folks. See you next year. At least we’ll have
memories of that titanic victory over conference doormat Arizona.
Or San Diego State.

Public sentiment among the higher-ups in the athletic department
has always been that Karl Dorrell is gradually building an elite
program at UCLA.

At least once a week, Dorrell is sure to tell reporters how
excited he is about the direction the program is going. Well, not
only am I not excited, but I’m not sure Dorrell would know
the right direction if you gave him a map, a compass and a couple
of campus tour guides to help him find it.

The longer the Bruins go without a signature victory under
Dorrell, the harder it’s going to be to make the case that
they are a much-improved team this season. Sure, UCLA’s
high-octane offense is better and so is the team chemistry, but the
Bruins are still winless against teams that have a winning
record.

In fact the four teams that UCLA has beaten ““ Illinois,
Washington, San Diego State and Arizona ““ lost by a combined
140-9 score on Saturday and are 0-16 this year in conference
play.

So what’s next? What will it take for UCLA to salvage the
season and rinse out the sour taste that the Arizona State loss
left in its fans’ mouths?

Short of toppling top-ranked USC, I’m not sure it’s
possible.

The next two home games against Stanford and Washington State
are winnable, but what does winning actually mean? Sure, two
straight victories will end talk of another season-ending collapse,
but the Bruins cannot be satisfied with being a six-win team.

UCLA had a chance to be more than that. But in 1 minute and 45
seconds, the team flushed away that opportunity for another
year.

Eisenberg’s column appears every Monday during
football season. E-mail him at [email protected].