Leave striking to highly skilled workers

A wise old entrepreneur named Ralph von Albertson once said,
“If I need ’em that bad, I’ll pay ’em that
good.”

Several days now into the Southern California grocery
workers’ strike, it is becoming clearer and clearer this
fictitious character is a man of his word.

Grocery locations continue to operate while lackluster strikers
pace the parking lots in an attempt to make customers realize who
the real victims are. The only problem for them is that we already
know.

The real victims are the meat lovers ““ those forced to
submit to a slightly limited selection of beef and poultry due to
delivery shortages. The mass yogurt purchasers unable to collect
two of every flavor because of faster approaching expiration dates.
And the vegetarian whose goods may require a couple extra seconds
for new clerks to look up the all-important product numbers.

The picketers have succeeded in causing these very minor
inconveniences. In all other respects, including those essential to
their higher purpose, they are failing.

But why?

“The success of a union strike varies directly with the
specialized skill level and scarcity of the union’s
workforce,” says fictitious economist Ralph von Albertson as
he shares his wisdom with us once again.

So let me get this straight. If workers are highly skilled and
hard to come by, then striking in order to achieve specific demands
from management is more likely to end in the employees’
favor?

These people are cashiers. They are stockers and scanners.

There’s a reason why self-checkout was put into place.
It’s buttons and barcodes and not much else.

Now, as a former moderator of “goods-for-money
transactions” at several places of business throughout my
young life, I will admit my heart has a soft spot for the
cashiering profession.

However, I never once was foolish enough to believe I was
irreplaceable, and for upward of well over $20 an hour, neither
should they.

Perhaps it is now time to discuss said replacements. You may
have a story of your own to share, but this little anecdote shall
suffice for now.

As I crossed the picket line to enter my grocer of choice, I was
handed a piece of pro-union literature to evaluate in the privacy
of my own shopping cart. Naturally, the commentary that many of you
have become familiar with contained strong language concerning the
promotion of corporate greed and the inhumanity of cutting worker
benefits.

Contrary to what I may sound like thus far, I had to agree with
almost all of it. Full-time skilled workers, under normal
conditions, do indeed deserve considerable compensation.

Members of the fire or police departments work hard to earn
strong health and pension benefits above their normal income. Other
skilled and desired union workers in offices, on construction
sites, and in schools garner benefits and pensions to further
compensate for less-than-stellar wages.

But let me reiterate, we’re talking about cashiers,
stockers and scanners. Back to the anecdote.

As I perused the dry goods section of the striking
establishment, I was warmly greeted and asked by a slightly grungy
looking replacement in a hooded sweatshirt if I needed any help. I,
of course, assumed he would be unable to help, so I said no
thanks.

Minutes later, being the college student I am, I was struggling
among generic vermicelli, generic spaghetti and generic
spaghettini, when the grungy replacement insisted that I listen to
his advice.

“You don’t want that crap,” he said in an
obvious abandonment of customer service protocol. “For 30
cents more try this and this with a little bit of this.” It
would be just 48 hours later when the recommended pasta concoction
hit my taste buds in one of the most joyous eating experiences of
my life.

I will no longer accept grocery advice from clean-shaven
employees with tucked-in shirts, but I digress.

With an overall feeling of satisfaction from my shopping
experience, I exited the doors with a smile on my face and a spring
in my step.

Using my cart like an old train front cow-catching mechanism, I
wedged my way through the distraught, striking crowd on my way to
the car. All of a sudden, about 100 yards from the store exit, a
man taps me on the shoulder.

“Sir, you forgot a bag,” he said as he tried to
catch his breath.

“Thank you so much,” I said in a tone that must have
combined gratitude and extreme shock into one thought.

The cashier replacement felt that my Farmer John hot dogs, a
Betty Crocker cake mix and the recommended new pastas were worthy
of abandoning a short line of customers and expending significant
energy to make sure they ended up in my cupboard and refrigerator
that evening.

And with that gesture, my allegiance was solidified.

So, as the striking union continues its holdout and unskilled
laborers are adequately trained in a day or less to fill in
throughout Southern California for half the usual wages, thousands
of grocery men and women are beginning to realize how good they had
it.

Philanthropist Ralph von Albertson was content paying more than
the average new college graduate earns to these striking union
members. Now it looks like the cost to these former employees will
be far greater than the little health co-payments they were asked
to contribute.

Green is a fifth-year business economics and history
student.