OK Bruins, stop teasing and show us your stuff

  Mike Maloney Maloney, the Daily Bruin’s
newest sports columnist, is persistent to a fault. E-mail him at
[email protected].

Let’s face it, last season was exhausting. It was all one big
tease.

The 2000 edition of the UCLA football team spent the better part
of four and a half months just teasing us with their potential.

By the third Saturday in September, the Bruins had even their
most fair-weathered fans salivating at the prospects of a season
for the ages. Miraculously, the Bruins had reeled off three
consecutive come-from-behind victories, including wins over a pair
of third-ranked teams (Alabama and Michigan). Needless to say, the
Bruin faithful had circled the bandwagons and Jan. 3 on their
calendars.

But instead of an ascent to the mountain top, the 2000 season
proved a roller coaster worthy of Magic Mountain. And remember
kids, when you ride the roller coaster, you have to heed the
warnings: those with heart problems, pregnant women and those who
cannot handle triple-overtime losses to the lowly California Bears,
should not go on this ride.

In a classic case of “what goes up …”, the boys in
powder blue ended the regular season with two more heart breaking
losses to Washington and (insert your favorite expletive here) USC.
All told, the Bruins finished the regular season 6-5 and saw nine
of their 11 games decided by eight points or less. Which, of
course, is good for fourth quarter television ratings, but very
tough on those attempting to maintain a healthy heart rate.

According to NCAA by-laws, any football team over .500 that has
the slightest chance of making the NCAA money must play in a bowl
game. The “head just above water” Bruins were shipped
to the Sun Bowl. Now, to the casual collegiate football fan, the
Sun Bowl might sound like a pretty desirable destination.

“Hey,” you might say unwittingly to your friend,
“we’re going to the Sun Bowl, baby! It doesn’t
get any bigger than that, huh?” And your buddy, who thinks a
halfback sweep involves undoing someone’s bra might reply,
“Not in this solar system!”

Aside from the fact that it may be time to find new friends, you
should know that the Sun Bowl takes place annually in El Paso,
Texas. And as everyone knows, events of importance are forbidden to
take place in El Paso. If you don’t believe me, check the
Constitution.

As it turned out, the Sun Bowl merely provided “Team
Tease” one more opportunity to hone their Jekyll and Hyde
act. UCLA would squander a 10-point halftime lead, and when the sun
set on the Sun Bowl, Wisconsin carried a one-point victory home to
Madison. The Bruins, on the other hand, were left with a parting
gift more depressing than hot pink Lee Press-On Nails ““ a
.500 season.

To this day, the 6-6 Bruin campaign remains disappointing, and
I’m sure, still fills fans with frustration. But it’s
important to realize that last year’s club wasn’t the
same type of team that raced to the top of the polls in ’97
and ’98. During the aforementioned last two years of Cade
McNown’s tenure, the football gods cast smile after smile in
the Bruins’ direction. The result was good fortune, and for
the most part, good health.

The last two years, however, the team has been riddled by more
injuries than the loud and obnoxious USC fan that shows up at
Madison’s for dollar beer night. In 2000 alone, the Bruins
lost Cory Paus, DeShaun Foster and Kenyon Coleman (just to name a
few) to injuries that would force them to miss multiple games, and
in Coleman’s case, nearly the entire season. Now, it
doesn’t take a structural engineering major to figure out
that a team without its foundation will have a hard time staying
upright when adversity starts to hit.

Foster’s injury, a broken bone in his right hand, was
particularly frustrating. After racking up 422 yards and six
touchdowns in the Bruins’ first three games, Foster looked
destined to rake in the hardware come year’s end. The
Downtown Athletic Club was on hold, and they had already etched
“DESH” on the Doak Walker Trophy. But after an off-game
against Oregon, and the injury against Arizona State, Foster
wouldn’t hit his stride again until week nine against
Stanford ““ much too late for a Rose Bowl run.

This season, the Bruins need their senior tailback to remain
healthy and productive. To borrow a phrase from Mr. October, Reggie
Jackson, Foster is the straw that stirs the drink for the Bruins.
If you need proof, look no further than the stat sheet. UCLA was
undefeated during the regular season last year (5-0) when Foster
carried the ball 24 or more times a game.

If Foster and the rest of his teammates can stay healthy this
season, with a few smiles from the football gods, the Bruins should
be back playing in a bowl game that matters.

At least that’s what the Bruin faithful are hoping.
They’re hoping for a season where they can talk about
production instead of potential. They’re hoping that this
season, the teasing stops. After all, a fan can only take so
much.