Judge trumpets unity of the sexes in speech at UCLA

Monday, February 2, 1998

Judge trumpets unity of the sexes in speech at UCLA

POLITICS Speaker says equality of women only way to achieve
peace

By Michelle Navarro

Daily Bruin Staff

"Bride Burning." This pair of words may seem odd to members of
this country. However, it has a frightening familiarity to the ears
of the women who live in India. And when U.S. Court of Appeals
Senior Judge Dorothy Nelson explained what this term meant, the
packed lounge in Kerckhoff Hall gasped in shock and horror.

When a wife gets married in India, she gets a dowry from her
parents, which goes into her and her husband’s finances, said the
former USC dean of law. When it runs out, the mother-in-law often
requests more money. So they go back to the family of the wife.

If there is nothing left to give, Nelson said, "the
mother-in-law or the husband pours kerosene over the wife and sets
her on fire. This still happens today."

Every year, 5,000 women in India die from "accidental burning."
This appalling figure, followed by others Nelson gave, illustrates
how disturbingly unequal women are around the world.

In the United States, it is estimated that every nine seconds, a
woman is abused by an intimate partner.

It is this treatment of women that must end before universal
peace may be achieved, emphasized Nelson to a crowd of students and
faculty last Thursday.

"Eliminating violence," Nelson said, "is necessary for peace at
home, and at large."

The lecture was sponsored by the UCLA Baha’i Club and the
Women’s Resource Center. Nelson built the majority of her talk on
the teachings of the Baha’i faith, a religion whose founder,
Baha’ullah, stressed the importance of unity in God, religion and
humanity.

"The world of humanity is possessed of two wings: the male and
female. So long as these two wings are not equivalent in strength,
the bird will not fly."

This passage, taken from the statement, "Two Wings of a Bird,"
written by the National Spiritual Assembly of the Baha’is of the
United States (an administrative body for the Baha’is), neatly sums
up how both women and men, with their different talents and gifts
are essential to the harmony of mankind. One alone cannot do the
job.

Using both humorous and startling anecdotes, Nelson shared her
knowledge of the state of women across the globe and accented the
indispensability of gender equality.

Her unique take on achieving equality, however, did not ask
women to go out and prove that they are just as capable of
performing the same tasks as men. She instead presented the idea
that women and men are different, but complementary to each
other.

Nelson’s husband, James Nelson, agreed when he stepped up to the
microphone. "I don’t think we see it as an issue of unity out of
diversity. Unity doesn’t mean we’re all the same. It’s a true
partnership, a complement to their own talents."

He added that equality is not a difficult principle to realize,
but simply needs to be taken to the heart.

Once the principle is accepted, one of the steps towards
equality is listening.

Several members of the audience belonged to the UCLA Conflict
Prevention and Mediation Program. Nelson validated the method they
utilize to resolve problems, one which Nelson herself taught to
students in the past.

"The hottest topic in the justice system today is the
appropriate form of mediation," she said, "You bring people
together and encourage everyone to speak and listen. You try not to
assign blame but to solve the problem."

This method may apply specifically to relations between men and
women. "You need to listen to each other and give each other value
as to what each has to say," she said.

James Nelson later reiterated the importance of talking and
listening to each other. The basic lesson to be learned by men is
to hear what the others are saying. As their unity grows, their
progress will increase. "Nothing is more powerful than unity," he
said.

Those words back what "Two Wings of a Bird" proclaims: "As long
as women are prevented from attaining their highest possibilities,
so long will men be unable to achieve the greatness which might be
theirs."

Not only do she believe that it is impossible for men to grow
without the growth of women, but Nelson also delved into a theory
that has been discussed as far back as the 19th century by
Catherine Beecher. This theory gives the bulk of credit in
child-rearing to the mother and emphasizes how the mother is the
educator and, therefore, the most important in shaping the women
and men of the future.

"The mother is basically the first teacher of the child. Even
before the child is born, she has an influence," Nelson said. She
emphasized the importance of education for women. "If the mom is
illiterate, both boys and girls will suffer."

Nelson noted how this critical observation is overlooked. She
pointed out that although the zero to five age group is the most
important time for a child to be with its mother, society still
makes it difficult for women to balance motherhood and their
professional life.

Not to mention in many cultures, an education is usually granted
to the son of a family when there are financial difficulties
present. But, Nelson questions this practice because of the
potential of motherhood for the daughter.

"If you have to choose between educating a girl or a boy.
Educate the girl," she said. "If you educate a boy, you educate an
individual. If you educate a girl, you educate a nation of both
boys and girls."

Students in the audience, found Nelson’s talk valuable and
enlightening.

"What she said was really provocative," said Angela Seo, a
fourth-year sociology student, "I don’t know much about the Baha’i
faith, but about social equality – I think she is in a good
position to tell us. It was kind of inspirational."

"This is awesome, I really enjoyed it," said Priscilla Tjio, a
first-year biology student and Bruin Belles member. "It’s a
different look on roles. If you be yourself, you gain more respect
instead of when you’re having to prove yourself."

Following the lecture given by the judge, the Baha’i club
presented three campus individuals with the "Two Wings of a Bird"
statement in recognition of their attempt to uphold the principle
in their daily lives.

Carol Peterson, vice provost of life sciences and the current
instructor for a course in conflict mediation, Cary Porter, the
senior associate dean of students and Susan French, professor of
law, were those chosen to receive the statement.

Niky Farid, president of the Baha’i Club on campus was pleased
with the evening.

"The overall point of the evening was to emphasize the
principle," said the second-year neuroscience student. "There was a
really good turn-out and great support from the campus. It seemed
like she (Nelson) knew how to relate to students."

Nelson asked those present, to discuss with others what was
touched on at the lecture. She asked that the idea of unity be
spread. James Nelson also added that from the unity between men and
women, a greater unity may be accomplished.

"Any unity in any area will increase the unity in other areas,"
he said.

"It’s a campaign to see that we’re all in the same boat. If the
boat leaks, we all need to bail."

For more information and upcoming Baha’i Club events, call
(310)453-9594.

JAMIE SCANLON-JACOBS/Daily Bruin

In an event sponsored by the Baha’i club, U.S. Court of Appeals
Judge Dorothy Nelson speaks on the role of women in the

establishment of world peace.