Hollywood’s B-sides

Hollywood’s B-sides

‘Forbidden Hollywood’ takes bites at Gump, Pulp, Disney and the
rest of Tinseltown in Gerard Alessandrini’s newest parody

By Jennifer Richmond

Daily Bruin Staff

If you’re a major actor in Hollywood, if you’re a famous film
director, if you’re anybody famous in Hollywood, DO NOT go see
Gerard Alessandrini’s "Forbidden Hollywood."

But if you’re a big theater fan who loves film from any era
ABSOLUTELY RUN to see this hysterically funny musical that cuts
more films than a film editor.

The music review takes a variety of famous movie scenes and
stars and blends them all together into a show stopping, foot
stomping laughter coaster.

Beginning and ending with Forrest Gump on his bench in Alabama,
the revue takes off like a rocket and keeps going. Although there
are a few pitfalls along the way, the show, that’s more songs than
story, packs in more laughs than groans.

Alessandrini doesn’t stick with today’s films. He goes from
Hollywood’s golden age all the way up to today’s multi-million
dollar productions. He even hits a couple yet to be releases: Kevin
Costner’s way-over budget Waterworld and Disney’s Pocohantas.

Alessandrini starts jabbing the film industry from the first
scene. Jason Graae’s Forrest Gump comes out and says he’s Tom
Hanks, has moved to Alabama and has deliberately lowered his IQ
since Forrest Gump made him so much money. But that’s only the
beginning.

He continues by telling how much movies have taught him:

"It’s OK to kill someone because Schwarzenegger only does it
when they’re bad. Julia Roberts only needs to be a hooker to fall
in love. And Barbra Streisand only needs to be a therapist to sleep
with Nolte."

That’s not the last we hear of Streisand. Barbra is picked on
two more times. Once for her miscasting in the movie version of
Hello Dolly in an astounding "Hello Barbra" and again for the fact
that she gets no respect when it comes to directing.

Just as harsh, "My Name is Rosie" picks at how moto-mouthed
Rosie Perez can’t stay away from the two words "fuck you."
Christine Pedi’s Perez is so right on, it’s almost impossible to
understand what she’s saying; just like it’s impossible to
understand Perez in her films.

Pedi shines again with her impression of Sharon Stone in "Raw
Hide." Pedi explains with the lyrics "Pull ’em off/ Take ’em
down/Take ’em down/Pull ’em off/Raw Hide," that Stone is only used
for her "bare backside" and sex scenes.

But one of her greatest moments is as Julie Andrews in Disney’s
Mary Poppins and Alessandrini’s version of
"Supercalifragilisticespialido-cious" which now reads
"Supercarelessfictionalnonsensicalverboseness," goes off about how
Disney can make a million with some strange, made up word.

Alessandrini gets another cut on Disney with Aladdin and Jasmine
singing "A Disney World." With lyrics like "A Disney world/ It’s
soon to be/ Just wait and see/A theme park trap/Of plastic
crap/Like you and me," it’s easy to see and fall in love with
Alessandrini’s biting sense of humor.

But it’s impossible for anyone to be on 100 percent all the time
and even Alessandrini falls a little short with his versions of
"The Sound of Music Part 2" and "The Piano."

While "Music Part 2" starts off hysterically funny, it ends up
going on for too long and loses it’s freshness.

The same thing happens with "The Piano." Alessandrini simply
rehashes the same scene three times and so ends up losing the
audience.

But Alessandrini gets back on track with other winners like
Susanne Blakeslee’s brilliant imitation of Audrey Hepburn singing
"Dub Me" from the film version of My Fair Lady, a very right-wing
"Forrest Gump" number and Jason Graae’s perfect rendition of Gene
Kelly singing "My Singing is a Pain" originally from the equally
annoying Singing in the Rain.

Although "Hollywood" wouldn’t exist without Alessandrini’s
lyrics, the show wouldn’t be nearly as great if it weren’t for
Pedi, Blakeslee, Graae and Gerry McIntyre. All four actors, two of
which performed in Alessandrini’s first satire on entertainment,
"Forbidden Broadway," prove over and over again how talented they
are by the number of times they switch characters. One minute
they’ll be one famous actor and the next they’ll be someone else.
And they don’t miss a soul.

With all this laughter and hysteria, there’s no doubt this show
will win an Oscar, but an Oscar made of brass.

STAGE: "Forbidden Hollywood." Created, written and directed by
Gerard Alessandrini. Starring Susanne Blakeslee, Brad Ellis, Jason
Graae, Gerry McIntyre and Christine Pedi. Running through May 28 at
the Coronet Theater. Performing Tuesday through Friday at 8 p.m.,
Saturday at 5 p.m. and 8 p.m. and Sunday at 3 p.m. and 7 p.m. TIX:
$29.50 ­ 34.50. For more info call (310)657-7377.