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A night one friend will never forget

By Daily Bruin Staff

Oct. 27, 1994 9:00 p.m.

A night one friend will never forget

By Todd Hanson

The recent controversy over sponsorship of the Interfraternity
Council failed to take into account the five-month anniversary of a
night when a friend of mine encountered a dozen fraternity members.
Shortly after midnight on Saturday, May 28, 1994, my friend dropped
me off at the top of Roebling Avenue and drove down the hill
towards Landfair.

It was a drive he will never forget.

My friend, who is Indian, stopped at the corner to make a left
turn. He waited for about 12 males, some of whom were wearing
shirts with fraternity letters, to cross the street. One of them
noticed my friend in his car, and shouted with an insulting
"Indian" accent: "Look! 7-Eleven must be closed!" Another came to
the driver’s side, opened the door and started to roughly pull my
friend’s arm. After trying to push the attacker away, my friend was
hit in the jaw for resisting.

Meanwhile, other attackers ­ all of whom were white ­
shook his car up and down, yelling more racist epithets. One then
attempted to open the passenger side door while others stood around
the car laughing.

My friend escaped by grabbing and slamming the driver’s door
shut, and then by slowly edging his car forward through the
crowd.

His physical pain from this unprovoked attack healed long ago.
But the wounds from having his race insulted, his personal security
threatened and his pride attacked still cause biting emotional and
mental pain five months afterward.

He thought he was safe at UCLA. He, and all of us, needs to
think again.

My anger over what happened to my friend could easily cause me
to hate the fraternity system. But I am angry only at some of the
members of the greek system, because I believe that there are two
groups of males within it ­ boys and men.

First I will address the boys, at whom my anger rages.

Boys do not realize or care that their words and actions have
consequences for others, as well as for themselves. Boys refuse to
accept responsibility when they are wrong. Boys deny their faults,
or are blind to them. I have met and seen many boys in the
fraternity system.

Some prove they are boys by throwing a burning table off the
roof of their fraternity house. Others prove it with racist
comments. A dozen others proved it that night in May by attacking
my friend.

Another group proved it with an ad in the Daily Bruin which
began by saying "So you think you know the system?" and then listed
a variety of service projects and other activities in which their
fraternity is active. It concluded with, "We knew you were wrong!"
The list of service projects included Tree People and the UCLA
Hunger Project.

I don’t care what work fraternity members do for Tree People (or
any other philanthropy) if that evening you attack my friend. I
don’t care how many homeless people’s stomachs you fill with soup
if you continue to ladle servings of racial hatred into the minds
of your brothers and new pledges.

Some may think that I am wrong for having reservations about the
sincerity and effectiveness of greeks’ efforts to combat racism
within the system. The boys who attacked my friend proved my
reservations to be correct. Boys, until you reach beyond your
hatred, acknowledge that your actions have consequences, look
beyond yourself and take responsibility for understanding others,
you will always be boys.

Now, I will address the men within the system, and explain why I
am frustrated.

I’ve met many fraternity men and have visited some houses where
qualities of "manhood" predominate. Men who realize and care that
their words and actions have consequences on others. Men who not
only accept responsibility when they are wrong but work to correct
the faults or misperceptions which led to being wrong.

Men recognize when others’ actions are unacceptable and harmful
to others and they work against those actions. My frustration stems
from the fact that the men have not made a more concerted effort to
educate the boys and to clearly demonstrate a sincere and effective
effort to the UCLA community.

It is at this point in a Viewpoint article where the author
usually calls for more awareness workshops, more forums for
pledges, more community service work. All that’s great, but I
strongly believe that real change will only come about through
direct confrontation. People often feel powerless to combat racism,
but I believe we overlook the real power we have.

Personally, people have said "gook," "fag," misogynistic terms
and racist comments around me ­ but they usually don’t do so
more than once. First, I make it clear that I do not like them
using such terms. Then I tell them why I personally find their
words and attitude offensive, and why I think they hurt people.

This gets them thinking. Because their friend has confronted
them, someone they value and trust, it forces them to think. If it
happens again, I confront them again, with greater intensity. The
effect of these confrontations grows and the person perhaps moves
towards understanding.

Sound too idealistic? It isn’t. Individuals teach racism to
other individuals. Racism can be untaught by individuals as well.
It has happened. I have seen it occur.

So I call upon the men in the greek system to confront boys when
they say racist comments or perform racist actions. Show them that
you are tolerant of difference and intolerant of racism.

You have the power to affect boys’ views and lives. And if you
really want the UCLA community to accept and trust you, you are
compelled to act. If you really think you should be responsored,
show me in how you respond to the attack on my friend.

I now wish once more to directly address the boys in the system.
You may be tempted to throw this article away and call me a blind
liberal ideologue, or any variety of names, because you think I’m
completely wrong. Well then, let us look at the list of wrongs and
see who is really in the wrong.

Those individuals on the night of May 28, 1994 have grievously
wronged my friend and people of color in general. They have wronged
this university and what it stands for. They have wronged people
who work everyday towards the goal of racial understanding, and
they have wronged me. If this list is not long enough to awaken
you, then let your minds wrestle with this: In wronging my friend,
you have wronged yourselves.

Hanson is a fourth-year English student.

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