JWC gives birth to legends of our time

JWC gives birth to legends of our time

Chris Schreiber

Spring may be the time when flowers bloom and Clippers watch the
playoffs, but more importantly, this is the time when legends are
born.

That’s right, the spring hoops season is upon us, the time
crowds gather to play pickup games on courts with chain nets. Here
on campus, those crowds form at the John Wooden Center, a place
where legends go to play and scrubs go to watch.

Unlike Pauley Pavilion, however, those legends can rarely be
distinguished from the scrubs, which makes it a special place for
the average person: physical skill not required.

Even before the building was built, it flexed some of that
muscle ­ it was rumored that then-head basketball coach Larry
Brown left because he was tired of looking out his office window at
"a pile of dirt and a hole in the ground."

Brown acted rashly ­ in April of 1983 the pile of dirt and
hole in the ground became "The Dalis Palace" (a la Athletic
Director Pete, the administrative force behind its construction),
and ultimately, "Wooden," the model for rec centers on the West
Coast and the hub of west-campus activity.

Now the building named after a Legend produces some of its own.
This, of course, is the JWC Legend Awards.

Criteria for Legend Status were determined largely by Dennis
Koehne, the building’s assistant manager and a Legend himself.
Koehne has been there since the building opened and had this to say
about attaining legendary status:

"You need to be able to do things that others can’t or you have
to be such a fixture that there is instant recognition no matter
what time or day you come in."

Add to that elements of humor, boneheadedness or just plain
oddity, and you’ve got the requirements.

Keep in mind, of course, that fame and wealth don’t put you on
the list. If you’re keeping score at home, cross Woody Harrelson,
John Lithgow and Pat Boone off the list. (OK, put Pat Boone on the
list then cross him off.)

Neither does legendary status in other athletic arenas. Current
and former UCLA hoop stars like Mike Warren, Kiki Vanderweghe and
Marques Johnson didn’t make it. And neither did Hall-of-Fame locks
Michael Jordan, Kareem Abdul Jabbar or David Robinson, all of whom
have graced Collins Court at one time or another. Pat Riley, Jerry
West and a host of other NBA-types didn’t either. Magic? Close, but
not quite.

You don’t need to be a basketball player to make the list, but
in the Legendary hierarchy, hoop players are at the top. Sorry,
stairmaster robots, you were shut out.

For most basketball players, pickup games are your glory. And
this list is about all the glory you’re gonna get because you don’t
retire pickup jerseys, (and after running five straight games, you
don’t want to touch pickup jerseys).

Heretofore, The List:

Hands-Down Best Player Ever Legend: Raymond Lewis. The former
Verbum Dei standout is why you’ve ever heard of Verbum Dei ­
and the name that rolls off the tongue of every Wooden Center vet.
He could rain jumpers from 25 feet, one guy in his face, another
pulling his shorts down and another getting a piggy-back ride.
Scoring all 13 points was common. And don’t think 35-foot shots on
game point didn’t fall.

Consistency Counts for Something Legends: The Lunch Bunch. (Or
the NBA ­ Noontime Basketball Association). It would be
difficult to name every member of the group that has come in from
12-1 every weekday for 12 years. Among the notables: Joey Lucero,
small in stature but the winner of more double-A intramural
championships than you would ever believe, and Andy Banachowski,
UCLA women’s volleyball coach. The rest you know by sight, not
name.

Up and Comer Legends: Ernie "Midas" Bagner, a med student who
has pressed more flesh and gone through more introductions than any
other patron save former Bruin benchman Lou Richie. If you don’t
know the sincerely friendly Midas, you will soon. Legend
solidification: He met his wife under the Northeast basket.

Monroe Gorden. Though Gorden is still a pup in the eyes of some
legends, this is his sixth year of dominating side-court games and
his around-the-back move. When Gorden runs on the center court,
expect five points. "Uh, it’s somewhat of an honor, I guess," he
says. His status is secured by his reluctance to accept it.

Student Employee Legend: Tracy Gallagher. Gallagher will live in
the annals for one act alone: she refused the Man Himself, John
Wooden, access to the building when he failed to furnish photo
identification (sound familiar?). The ever-humble Wooden, a bit
staggered by the denial, calmly pointed to a picture of himself
sitting next to Gallagher on the counter, and said, "That’s me."
Hello, Tracy? Tracy?

Stretching Legend: Daniel Abebe. Ever see that guy on "That’s
Incredible!" who fit into, like, a milk carton? Kid stuff.

Legendary Injury Legend: Ed O’Bannon. That ACL-tear took place
right there on center court.

First Time Cool, Next Time Moron Legend: Current student Del
Curry. He shattered the backboard on center court during finals
week last quarter. Then went to the hospital to have the glass
removed from his face.

Coolest Non-Athlete, Piano-Player Legend: Henry Mancini, who
tickled the ivory of a grand piano brought into the Wooden Center
for a special celebration.

Best Basketball Player Who Has Slept With 20,000 Women Not to
Play Basketball Legend: Wilt Chamberlain, who also takes the title
of tallest racquetball player.

Dawg With a Dog Legend: Mike Tyson. In 1988, Tyson came into the
building with then-sweetheart Robin Givens, holding Givens’ tiny
little rat-type dog. When informed that dogs were not allowed in
the building unless they were seeing-eye dogs, Tyson covered up his
eyes with one arm and did a Stevie Wonder impression, then asked,
"Can I go in now?" For the next 10 minutes, he proceeded to hit on
the girl behind the counter, while Givens stood less than an
armlength away.

Strongest Man Legend: Ron Williams, freelance photographer,
showed off by doing reps on the bench press and fly machines with
the whole stack. Oh, yeah ­ he did it with one arm.

Best Pick-up Game Profes-sional Legend: Clyde Drexler.

Wrong Gym Legend: Shaquille O’Neal. I couldn’t keep him off the
list because he tore down three rims at the Men’s Gym in one
summer. Only threats to quit replacing them made him stop.