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Pac-10’s year of the quarterback? Try again next season

By Daily Bruin Staff

Oct. 24, 1994 9:00 p.m.

Pac-10’s year of the quarterback? Try again next season

Eric Billigmeier

Memo to Wayne Cook: Maybe it’s not your fault. Everyone and
their Aunt Bea knows the deal ­ UCLA’s quarterback is not
having a good year.

He has shown flashes of his past self (read: 1993), like
Saturday vs. Arizona, but compared to last season, Cook has
struggled tremendously. At times this year, struggled was not a
sufficient description.

Now, early on, he did lose the services of his main receiver
(J.J. Stokes) and three of his offensive linemen, whose
replacements played like replacements. And for awhile, I accepted
those excuses as valid.

But not anymore.

Now I’ve got a reason for the season myself: Everybody reeks.
That’s correct, kids, virtually every signal-caller in the whole
Pacific-10 Conference is ridin’ a stink bomb in ’94. Cook is
trapped in a tornado of 10 guys who can’t seem to hit the broad
side of the Rose Bowl.

Basically speaking, it isn’t Wayne’s fault. It can’t be ­
he just happens to be stuck quarterbacking UCLA during a season in
which everything that was supposed to happen hasn’t.

UCLA was supposed to challenge for the league title again. Uh,
no.

The Pac-10 was supposed to, as usual, dominate their weak little
brothers from the WAC. Well, we got ’em twice. Out of eight.

Cal was supposed to suck eggs. Well, okay, a few things panned
out as expected.

Point being, nothing’s gone exactly as planned this year. That’s
especially true for the quarterbacks in this wacky league ­
yes, the same quarterbacks who were the objects of slobbering
flattery from every coach in the league at the conference’s
pre-season media day. All of them, in my fabulously humble opinion,
are chunkin’ it up. For instance:

*Rob Johnson (USC) In fairness, he’s been bothered by a nagging
ankle injury all season, but even when he was supposedly healthy,
he didn’t exactly play like it. His replacement? Brad Otton ­
now there’s a name that strikes fear into the hearts of men.

*Damon Huard (Washington) I could complete passes in an offense
featuring the nation’s best running back. Well, perhaps predicting
a Billigmeier completion is a tad excessive, but this guy’s still
not worthy of the tongue-on-the-ground praise he’s getting showered
with. Can you say o-(my goodness, he is so o-)verrated? I think
they invented that chant with him in mind.

*Dave Barr (Cal) His senior year went kaput, along with his
shoulder, when Donnie Edwards drove him into the turf. His
replacement? Kerry McGonigal. On the field? How about 61-0? ‘Nuff
said.

*Chad Davis (Washington State) So he led the Cougars to a 21-0
shellacking of UCLA at the Rose Bowl. On that day, my grandmother
could’ve quarterbacked and WSU would still have gone home smiling.
(Of course, Grammy did make all-conference back in ’42.)

*Don Shanklin (Oregon State) Okay, so he can run (72 yards on
one play against UCLA). But his only completed pass against the
Bruins came after his five-yard touchdown run ­ when he
flipped the ball back to the referee.

*Steve Stenstrom (Stanford) Perhaps this kid is the exception to
the 1994 Pac-10 rule, considering his ever-impressive numbers.
After all, Bill Walsh said Stenstrom’s got better mechanics than 75
percent of Sunday signal-callers. And of course, everything Sir
William says should be set in stone. All hail the Genius. Yup.

*Danny O’Neil (Oregon) Pretty solid when he’s not hurt. Of
course, when he is, the Ducks lose (unless they’re playing USC).
His backup, Tony Graziani, would be second-string on my IM
team.

*Jake Plummer (Arizona State) Everybody keeps saying Jake "The
Snake" is gonna knock ’em dead someday on Sundays, but opposing
pass rushers are doing a number on him on Saturdays. Soon he’s
gonna be gone to the NFL and we’ll all be left wondering why ASU
still reeks.

*Dan White (Arizona) Yeah, he’s improved, but he still throws
like my sister. Seriously, this guy’s throwing motion reminds me of
some schnookered frat boy tossing darts at McGinty’s.

So in the end, what do you have? One guy with great numbers and
a crappy team. A few with decent potential. One or two who have
improved but still rank right below Brad Johnson on the list of
all-time greats. And, as was totally unexpected in the Pac-10 this
year, a whole big bunch of stinkers.

So, Wayne, maybe that’s it. Maybe there’s a mechanism that
controls the quality output inside all the arms of Pac-10 QBs, and
this season, it’s saying, "Sorry, dude, you’re a quarterback. This
just ain’t your year."

Geez, if that’s true, maybe the Bruins shouldn’t replace Cook
with Ryan Fien. Do jinxes carry over? A ’94 quarterback hex could
ruin UCLA in ’95, too. Then again, maybe Fien’ll have better
excuses to work with.

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